Soically Awkward

Soically Awkward

Wednesday, September 10, 2014

When I was Little, Part IV

Also seen on Imgur @:

Okay kiddies, rant time.

So I’ve received some messages that this story could not possibly be true because as "Septic Tank Experts"- it’s impossible to back up a toilet in the second story via the septic tank. *SIGH*.

Here’s the thing, I’m not debating physics. But telling me, a real memory of my childhood did not happen because you’re going off a diagnosis I made in my comic above… is a little laughable, don’t you think?

Allow me to enlighten you;

Firstly, this comic is a recollection (I am 23 now) of what happened when I was little. I WAS 10 YEARS old. So, my point of this is…  you are taking my half remembered fears (oh god the septic tank must be backing up)… and grading me on it as if to see if I got the answer right.

Duh, I didn't know what was 100% accurately happening in technical terms. I was ten, you twats. And yet I’ve been getting messages of people scoffing at me, saying a septic tank backing up on the second story is IMPOSSIBLE, so YOU ARE A LIAR.

I googled… you know, just to know if there are other liars out there, and guess what? The search “My toilet on the second story is backing up” has hundreds upon hundreds of hits. Simply put, the main line is clogged and backing up the toilet causing murky shit water to spill over.  The clogs can happen on any level, and depending on how far away from the actual toilet they are determines how much back water you get spilling over. Oh hey now, that sounds oddly familiar.

The end.

See though? See how easy that was?

Using common sense and such. We’re getting places guys! 

Shit like this DOES happen (pun intended). But for the love of god, don't hold your fucking breaths to see if I correctly and accurately discern a problem and draw it accordingly in a web comic. 

 Who cares if I misdiagnosed the mechanics behind the back up? (heaven forbid, I know. I am the devil). 

But now I’m faced with ignorant messages from people saying my whole story has become void because I said the septic tank backed up, and not the deep clog in the main lines got backed up. 

For fucks sake.
I'm afraid of you lot. I’m afraid that you take everything (even a ten year old memory) as the most literal fact there ever was. Like I sat there, a 10 year old girl, diagnosing the toilet and its issues. 

Unless its correctly laid out in front of you, you don't seem to be able to create conclusions or assumptions about what  probably happened. 

Toilets back up on any story of the house.
But the septic tank wouldn't cause any of the higher elevated problems. That's due to blockage and/or other drains (like the washing machine) draining into it and clogging it.


  1. This was on reddit. I laughed hard from this story and shared it with others!

  2. Here from reddit. That was a hilarious read. Just read through all your stuff and I love your narration, art, and life. Keep it up.

  3. Putting the laugh apart, I must say that I just want to hug you and say that, even if you did it, it wasn't your fault. You were little and desperate, I totally understand it. Sorry for Andrew, but I feel more sorry for you, keeping that in silence for so much time...

    And yeah, it was hilarious. I'll be wandering around your blog, good luck!

  4. I saw this on 9gag omg this shit was so funny! Literally!

  5. From SG. read all of your posts after reading this. your works are incredible! will check back for any updates! continue doing what you do, i'm sure you have brought smiles on many people faces. =D

  6. Holy crap. I saw your Glow in the dark Ghost story on reddit, and then reddit died and I had to search. So glad I did. This is so much better. This is the most wonderful thing I have seen in a least a year. Thank you for sharing, I am not sure I would have been able to.

    Next, you are not a bad person. You were only 10, and you cleaned it up, so good that no one could tell (as far as your little mind knew). You are a good person. I think I love you. Marry me.(mostly a joke :) )

    As for the plumbing problem, as I have spent a bit of time as a plumber :).

    People are stupid. If the clog is in the part before it branches out to the rest of the downstairs, it can back up. It will start with a slow drain, then as the holes that "stuff" can pass through gets filled up it will slow more and more. After a while (or fast, depending on lots of factors), it will back up. Seriously, there isn't anything different between 1st floor and 2nd, as far as backups are concerned. If you get a clog, you get a clog. If water keeps going it, it will have to come out somewhere. Depending on your house, and where the clog is, this can be the bath tub, or yes, the toilet.

    Now I am off to peruse your blog.

  7. This made me laugh so hard I cried. I wish you had a daily comic. It is funny enough to fill the hole in my life from when Bill Watterson retired.

  8. People is stupid. Water is reaching the second story, obviously, depending on the distribution it can push stuff from below. You are amazing!!

  9. This story is so tragically funny that I just can't stop laughing!

    And no matter what some "experts" say, I don't even care if it's true or not: it feels true, which is the most important thing! It's one of that typical huge mess everybody has done (at least once) in his childhood...and no many children are so brave to take the blame when they are relieved from this without even having really to lie!

    I just wonder if Andrew will ever know abot this...and if he will ever forgive you! I mean, I can imagine how girls who knew about the fact must have looked at him after that, at that time... ;)

  10. OMG!!! I guess, I didn't laugh so much many years ago.... Lord Jesus!!! I loved it! Made me happy cry! :"D

  11. HAHAHAAH! Laughed myself here, this story (and the other ones you already posted) are really amazing! Nice comic too! I loved the art style! Keep going \O/

  12. That was hilarious, you're the real life Harry from Dumb And Dumber

  13. Your comics are great! keep it up!!
    Ignore the haters!

  14. I did...something like this once. I had drunk too much alcohol at a bar, and I had run to the bathroom to vomit but I did it in the sink instead, and it clogged up. But I just kept vomitting so the sink was pretty full of it. And I thought oh water should dilute it to make it easier to flow, so I stupidly turned on the tap and let it run for a while. Then I fell asleep on the toilet for half an hour due to the alcohol. People kept knocking on the door asking if I was coming out soon, and especially my friend (with whom I'm not on close terms with) asking if I can hurry it up. So I finally woke up COMPLETELY, and horror of horrors, THE VOMIT WAS STILL THERE. So I tried using the cardboard inner tubing of toilet paper rolls to scoop my watery puke from the sink to the toilet bowl, then my fingers... until I spied a little in for sanitary napkins (thank goodness it was empty) and used that instead. But it was a horrid, stinking process and yeah. So utterly embarrassing because the people I were with actually had a rough idea of what had happened (never felt close enough to them to admit the full story)

  15. This must be the funniest thing I have ever read in 7-8 years. I laughed my ass of for straight 20 minutes,tears coming from my eyes, and couldn't stop! Now my stomach hurts because of that much laughing and the only thing I want right now is to forget all of this so i can read it from the start again! :D

  16. I read your story from Honestly, that was the most funniest thing I had read in a while, complete with Gintoki's zomgwtfhax face, and it really make my week, no, my month! My faith to 9gag has been restored, for now, thanks to you. Milady sir, you just got yourself another fan.

  17. I laughed so hard at this! Your comics are awesome!

  18. This must be the funniest thing I have ever read in 7-8 years . I laughed my ass of for straight 20 minutes,tears coming from my eyes , and couldn't stop! Now my stomach hurts because of that much laughing and the only thing I want right now is to forget all of this so i can read it from the start again! :)
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